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Mea Culpa by `cooper:iconcooper:

Categories Literature > Poetry > Human Nature > Open




Mea Culpa
Stephen Cooper
February 11, 2005

Three drinks past perfection,
Coral lanterns swayed in the sky.

*Flash*

Eight minutes and twenty seconds past connection,
Chartreuse lights signaled consent.

*Flash*

Five sirens past acceptance,
Amber flares escorted the surviving soul.

*Flash*

Nine years past remembrance,
Metal bars echo absolution.
©2005-2009 `cooper
:iconcooper:

Author's Comments

Featured in Contemplicity's current release Confluence [link]

So please stop by and tell me what you think. Take care

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconchosenone-:
`chosenone- Jul 4, 2005, 10:48:14 PM
Whoa. I like the style you chose, it's very fitting for this work. You managed to express so much in the two lines between flashes, it's overwhelming. I like how the flashes become so brutal, it feels like we (the readers) are totally powerless to stop a series of events unfolding, the flash pounding the message into us further. The skipping time-frame is beautifully executed (no pun intended), I especially liked the last line.

--
I'm the cruelest nine months anyone can suffer.
:iconcooper:
`cooper Jul 5, 2005, 4:32:44 AM
Thank you very kindly for your remarks, they have made my day :) take care and be well
:iconlilithlairpoetry:
~LilithLairPoetry Sep 22, 2005, 8:55:10 AM
I love the word 'Chartreuse" it kinda rolls off my tongue when I say it...:) Love the action/pause sequences leading the stanza into the next.

--
"There is nothing to fear, when I'm here, I want to feel your touch, because I love you so much!! Love you Stephanie!!" =LilithLairPoetry

Clubs
*Circleoffriends=Deviant-Underground=DailyDeviants~Lullaby-Poetry:devinvisible-i
:iconxiooua:
~xiooua Sep 22, 2005, 12:48:42 PM
I just realized a few days ago that I had never been to your gallery and I told myself that was silly, I'm glad I decided to stop by, this is a great piece! I loved your metaphors and the way you moved these scenes along. I felt like I was watching a movie. I especially loved the third stanza though, a great literary expression.

Take care! =)
:iconcooper:
`cooper Sep 22, 2005, 6:28:39 PM
thank you kindly for your commentary! :O much appreciated, take care and glad you enjoyed it
:iconcooper:
`cooper Sep 22, 2005, 6:29:36 PM
Wow thank you kindly for doing so! Much appreciated my friend! Not many dare to visit the Coopman's gallery these days.... :O maybe I should post some boobs... that would sooo help! lol... :O as long as they aren't man boobs... :O anyways take care and thanks again
:iconxiooua:
~xiooua Sep 22, 2005, 6:31:55 PM
Well it's helped some of the female writers around here. =P

I guess it's good that you don't have a crap gallery, you wouldn't have been able to draw me in with boobs!
:iconlilithlairpoetry:
~LilithLairPoetry Sep 23, 2005, 6:08:13 AM
Your welcome! :)

--
"There is nothing to fear, when I'm here, I want to feel your touch, because I love you so much!! Love you Stephanie!!" =LilithLairPoetry

Clubs
*Circleoffriends=Deviant-Underground=DailyDeviants~Lullaby-Poetry:devinvisible-i
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April 12, 2005
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